since surgery has been changed to tomorrow, i've been restless. i'm so glad bo's parents decided to drive up because that breaks up the day and keeps me from going crazy. time goes by so slow when you're here. i feel like i have nothing to do when orion is sleeping. there's no housework, no cleaning, no making milk, no extensive playing (when you're in ICU). i miss orion's happy smiles and laughter. he shows a little bit of excitement every so often, but he's probably uncomfortable with the chest tube and not happy lying down in the crib most of the time.
right now it's 11pm. orion stops eating formula at midnight and has clear fluids until 6am. he is most likely second case, but they want to make sure his stomach is empty in case they decide to let him go first.
this postponed surgery is messing up our emotions. we were already trying to prepare for today only to find out we have to feel those same anxious feelings for another day. this is probably adding to my sick-to-my-stomach nauseous feeling, not to mention another day of no sleep.
i will probably try to nap bedside tonight. bo has a lot of work to do tonight, so no sleep for him. i suppose it's probably time to give him back his computer :)
will post updates tomorrow!